How to tell an infertile you're pregnant

I felt the need to write this post as an afterthought of my post titled "alone".  Afterwards, SO many people came up to me and said "I'm sorry.." "I know I have probably said hurtful things to you" or I can just tell in their heads they are thinking about every word before they say it.. praying whatever comes out doesn't throw me into hysterics.  This was NOT my intention when I wrote that post.  But that got me thinking.. people genuinely don't KNOW how to deal with someone with infertility.  They don't know what to say and not say.. do and not do.  So, I feel the need to elaborate more on my "alone" post and hopefully leave you feeling more educated and able to deal with people in my condition, rather than scared to death to talk to me.
Can we all just talk about the elephant in the room here?  The fact that I work with ALL women, and they are all getting pregnant right now. Of course everyone is SO excited to tell everyone their huge news!! Hell, when it's my turn.. I'm pretty sure I will be screaming it from the roof and hanging a banner in my front lawn.  But let me educate you on what happens when an infertile hears about someone close to them getting pregnant.
> We get instant tunnel vision
> Our palms start to sweat
> Our hearts start hammering in our chest, 100 miles an hour
> A huge lump forms in our throat
> We instantly obsess about how often we will be dragged into a conversation about pregnancy
> We can't stop thinking about how much it will hurt to see your belly growing
> We automatically start calling out to God for help as we feel a meltdown approaching

Now, do you THINK we want this to happen in front of you?  Or worse, in front of a group of people?  It is probably the most embarrassing thing ever.  People look at you like you are being rude or "selfish" for not being happy or excited, the pregnant person thinks you're mad at them, then everyone pities you, then they talk about how bad it must suck to be Tifani Powell.  People like me can't just hear about a friend being pregnant and instantly go out and ask you when you're due and how you're feeling.  We need time.  Time to grasp the concept of yet another person in my inner circle being pregnant.  Time to talk with God and have him give me even MORE strength and comfort to accept this new curveball.  Time to prepare myself for the pregnancy/baby conversations that are to come for the next 9 months or longer and for watching your body grow and change as mine still sits here empty. 

When telling an infertile you're pregnant, don't catch us off guard.  It is so embarrassing for us to have one or more people watch us crumble and hurt, and it makes us feel even worse that if makes the pregnant person feel as if she did something wrong or that we are upset at them for something.  Do shoot us a text a week or so before you tell everyone else.  Give me time to absorb this information by myself with no one watching so I can scream, cry, and drop to my knees in prayer without making anyone else upset.

Rant over!! I hope this is more of an educational post than an "I can't believe she wrote that, who is that about? Did I do something? Is she mad at me?" post.  I am trying to help people understand my situation and be more sensitive to me and others like me.

Doctor-wise.. Will and I have completed all pre-requisites (again) for IVF, and have saved all but $500 to pay for it!  We also were accepted into a program to receive 50% off all fertility meds.. which will end up being about $700 which is great!  So now I am just waiting to start my period and begin our cycle!  Thanks for reading!! :-)

And to lighten the mood.. (but seriously though!!)